Thursday, June 15, 2006

My Dearest Love,

I wish you were here to help me celebrate. Today is my 12th Cancerversary. You were always the one to remember and do something special. I find it ironic beyond words that I am here, writing to you, and you are "in the next room" because of the disease I found out I had twelve years ago.

Remember? We were living on Dayton in the old Queen Anne. I waited until we were in bed to tell you and we lay there and cried and held each other all night long. Joe was only one and Kate was three then. I remember thinking that I would die before they had enough memories of me to remember me after I was gone. Now it is you they must struggle to remember.

Barb and Jon came over the other night and she and I went through all of the photo albums while Jon and Joe planted a new rose bush next to the lamp post in the driveway. Later they joined us as we cruised down memory lane. There were a lot of laughs at our old pictures, old bodies, and old fashions. We were all thinner, had more hair, and some of us wore really funny glasses.

I have something serious I want to talk to you about, but I am not going to do it now. I need to think about dinner and feeding the kids. I feel like I haven't been performing up to your standards in this respect, but tonight I am actually going to fix a vegetable - green beans, your favorite. I hope that you are watching wherever you are. I love you and miss you so much.

Yours,

D.